Wednesday, February 28, 2007

What is romantic?

I should have done this before Valentine's Day, but maybe this past month will provide some really juicy answers.

What is romantic?

I fear that I may not be romantic.

Isn't it possible to be romantic at home? Or is it?

If I love gerbera daisies, irises and lilies more than red roses, is there something wrong with that? Lilies are breath-taking and daisies make me happy.

I always feel silly when faced with the expectation of romance. I get that REALLY big question mark bubble over my head.

And all I can think is Yikes, I'm in trouble. It isn't that I don't care or that I don't want to do the work. I am just clueless. I have very simple needs to keep me very happy.

I mean, maybe I am just too easy. I love coffee, books, trees, nature, flowers. So, a pound of coffee from one of my favorite coffee shops, a favorite author, and dinner-out, would be a lovely evening for me.


What is most important to me is spending time together. I love having 'face time', catching up, laughing together, eye contact, and an uninterrupted conversation about nothing in particular. I need that time to connect and just be. I don't need to be entertained or impressed; I am impressed by getting a glimpse at the inside of my love, not by things. The important part is the interaction and the time together.

I mean, to me romantic is a quiet dinner, a glass of excellent wine, a walk on the beach (but this is Cleveland and there is none of that this time of year, unless you travel), great music (I would request Lizz Wright, Cassandra Wilson, and Miles Davis to start), and then nothing. Nothing but the two of us and time.

Am I missing the point? What is romantic?


  1. I don't equate romance with grand gestures or extravagance. Those can be fun, but I too, love the simple things that demonstrate that someone has paid attention.

    Great choices for music. I love all three. :)

  2. You sound romantic to me.

  3. Romance is whatever works between you and the one you love. There's no set perscription for romance. Romance can be as simple as leaving the last of the half and half for your partner, or cleaning up after them at night because they're too tired. It's not the stuff of the movies or Hallmark, it's the little things that show the other, day in and day out, that you care. The things you listed? To me those are romantic.

  4. thanks. that makes me feel much better.

    kelly: i think attention the most romantic gesture also.

    zoe: aw, thanks. (blushing) ;)

    sassy: I agree, i'm not looking for hallmark. There is just such an expectation of 'romance' for that one day. I don't want it for that one day. I am looking for what matters everyday. Thanks.

  5. Just think about what you like and it's usually the same for them. Romance can also be a small favor, courtesy and doing a small thing for someone to make their load lighter.

  6. I agree with the concensus. Grand gestures are nice, but the little things count twice as much.

    Basically, I believe romance is seeing yourself in the eyes of the person you love. Um, if that makes sense.

  7. A kind word, a thoughtful favor, a just becuase gift or gesture.

    Romance personified.

    Tuning in and playing it out.

    You sound pretty romantic to me too. :)

  8. romance in my eyes, is consideration for your partner, and showing them in the smallest of gestures....
    So I think that from your post, you are a romantic person..


  9. I'd say you're quite romantic, love the music choices too btw. I don't think of it as romantic, but I try to do little things for Lucy that she wouldn't expect. Cooking occasionally instead of going out, making sure she has the sweets she likes.

  10. well, thanks all. I appreciate the affirmations/encouraging words. I just sort of freeze when I know someone is expecting romance. (actually, i kind of giggle, and then just get that question mark thing going on)

    I appreciate it. I'm feeling down-right worthy right now. I will never measure up to Trinity2, but Goddess, who could? ;)


  11. wow. i love this post!! i could totally relate to the "face time...uninterrupted conversation."

    to me...that is it.

    hands down.

    great, great post!! :)

    oh...and yes, it does sound like you are and already know the answer to your question